Right??? Slushies were hands-down my school cafeteria's best investment - ever. And we'd all walk around drooling red, blue, or yellow during recess in a deep, satisfied brain freeze. Some Louisiana nut just brought New Orleans to a whole new level of freak.
And I thought I was onto something with Anti-freeze Martinis....but it just goes to show you that, although we may grow old, we never really grow up. And I'm okay with that.
My birthday's fast approaching. 23. Ugh.
Naturally I'm asking for a new toy (aka new cell phone). Naturally I don't trust my parents with this lofty task of researching, comparing, dissecting different models...let alone account for my personal device needs.
So what the hell. There aren't just cell phones anymore. There's the track fone, cell phone, smartphone, blackberry, android. Between Jersey Shore 2 and Nealon's biceps, I haven't been able to focus for weeks. Don't even get me started on the Kin One and Two, introduced just yesterday.
Now that my head is officially spinning from this technological mess, let's just nix the track and cell models [seriously, be practical]. We've all heard of the Motorola Droid, but the 'android' technology is actually something different - and it's mind-boggling.
It's like your blackberry got busy with an iPhone, sneezed, and then took steroids. Those 'apps' that everyone raves about are customizable, at your fingertips! You can actually use one to scan barcodes and the GPS (that your phone also has) will price-shop the local retailers for you. If magic does exist in this world, it's android.
It's not about needing to have your contacts at hand and perhaps have some Solitaire or Bejeweled to pass the time anymore...but about wanting to juice up your handheld until you drown yourself in cyberspace and useless gizmos, completely withdrawn from reality and human interaction.
That got real serious. Real fast.
I think for the big 2-3 this year, I'm just gonna throw back a few Red Bull Vodka Slushies and tether to my landline. Cheers.
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