When It Comes to Getting That Rai$e

There comes a time in every twenty-something's career when they must demand a raise.

That time is usually when you're sick of living at your parent's or when your student loans burn 90% of your income upon deposit. Take for example, young Crook. Who repays the Gov $1,100 every single month.

Two lessons here: community college is a steal. and asking for a raise is a rite of passage.

So how to go about this brain-wracking task of demanding your worth? After all, you've been busting your hump every single day, slapping a smile on your face, forgoing sick days, and been the boss's yes-man for a solid six months. Maybe even been employee of the month (but probably not). You start to realize, "Yeah. Yeah I have been working real hard!" and the mental tick sheet of your accomplishments accumulates. You imagine that watermarked check in your hand, practically skipping down the street on your way to spend it frivolously. Then enter the There-Is-No-Way-I'm-Not-Getting-That-Raise state of mind. Yes. You're so getting that raise.

Cha-ching.

The sit-down with your manager will go like this: you calmly state, with an air of pomp, that you've been an asset to the team and you know your career has a future here. "It's the little things," you tell your manager, and he nods in approval. Maybe you have printed documents as proof.

Your manager calmly states, with an air of authority, that while you've been an asset to the team, there is still some room to grow. "I want to see you succeed," your manager tells you, and you nod agreeably. You think great! we are on the same page here. You say - no, you demand - a little extra dough for your troubles. Your manager flashes a smile and gives you a wink, he will "absolutely take it into consideration."

Before you know it the hammer came down and door's shut behind you. Poof. Those visions of swimming in pools of dollar bills just disappeared and you have no idea what happened. Momentary black out. Good job standing your ground. Git back to your cube.

Now the next six months you'll be racing to re-prove the proof. Hey, at least you had that little heart-to-heart. You know, put that bug in your manager's ear. But all the sudden those pay stubs change for the better and you have a WTF moment. You got that raise! FALSE. Not until you reach down your pants, find your balls, and grab 'em, will you ever see that coin.

Good luck to Crook today - go get 'em?