Two days til the Corporate Challenge. That means one thing: SPANDEX. You can thank me later.
Are they cutting down wind resistance or cutting off circulation? Gentleman. Spandex and all like materials promote a certain type of intimacy that should be saved for fishing trips (far, far removed from civilization) and slumber parties.
So for those of you considering the switch from free flowing fabrics to spandex, know that the world takes you about as seriously as we take policemen who cruise around on 10-speeds...(Big Mike, I totally just called you out)
Ergo, I ordered a small shirt for the Challenge - of course The Office decided to upgrade to spandex/fitness material. But I can get away with this because, although my midriff is hanging out and arms have muffin tops, my boobs look pornstar size and will deter any straight males from the carefully plotted running path. A total HR violation. And absolute proof that Corporate America is all about A) who you know and B) flaunting what you got.
As always. When in doubt...put out.
[and no hate for Big Mike, I know he'll be so proud of the newest addition to my wardrobe]
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