Thursday, March 10, 2011

The Follow-Up Call: when to start stalking.

Consider - a client who has purchased your services. Meaning that the credit card has been charged and you've labored to fill their every need. Collaboration is key in order to produce the best possible outcome. Right?

Then that bitch starts dodging your calls. WTF.

Fetti and I have been tracking down a few slippery little suckers. I don't get it. Why drop dimes and then avoid us? I mean, we're so charming!

Thing is. Their credit cards get run as per the contract.

So now their Rhondas hate us. It goes from "yup thanks for calling!" to "oh yeah I'll tell him you called" to "desk is now covered in post-its from you I think they got the message".

We've assaulted the voicemail inbox:
  • Call 1, cheer&hope: Gooood MORNING Mr. So-and-so! Just wanted to follow-up; we know you are running a tight ship. I have my cell on me at all times so DO NOT hesitate to call me day or night! Look forward to hearing back from you!
  • ...Calls 2-5, grudge: Hi So-and-so. We've been trying to reach you for X number of days. You have my number please get back to me so
  • ...Calls 6-infinity, desperation&heavy breathing: *gasp* HI. *gasp* Please, we need to hear back from you so we can continue working on your account. *gasp* Your final payment will be run *gasp* tomorrow morning. *click*)

Maybe you don't get it but we are crazier than a 13-yr old with Bieber Fever. Like Sandra Bullock as Mary Horowitz straight out of "All About Steve". We've got your pictures, phone numbers, heart-shaped memos/poems written out...

Let's get one thing straight. We creep because we care.

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