On the Market

Fish market. Stock market. Cube market?

Maybe I'm just The Office's secret weapon - weeding out the weaklings. The cube across from me is empty. Sorry New Guy, we had a good run.

Looks like once again, NLSts is on the prowl. This time it's for a new podmate. At least the situation has potential, provided that HR follows the specific guidelines from the Inner Office Memo.

In light of the up-coming holiday, tis the season for new outfits and accessories. The Butler telephoned a local shoe store to inquire about their selection of gold heels. Friendly Shoe Store Lady was quite rude and blunt during their 30 second exchange.

So we had Chi-chetti ring Friendly Shoe Store Lady, "Hi. Do you have any black shoes?" HookerJones suggested he call back asking for silver sparkling heels - in men's. Incidentally this amused me for a solid 30 minutes. Incidentally this is not that funny. BuckWild suggested asking for Dick Licker. That could be interesting. Playing Chuck, Fuck, or Marry? during lunch today was much more exciting.

Because the events in my life cease to entertain: my sister is moving back home. Now, I'm hardly a struggling twenty-something. Living at home hasn't completely crushed my soul.

But here's how I evaluate the under-aged invader: my sister's 19. she's just having fun. everyone takes a different path and honestly, college isn't for everyone. she's a good kid. she'll figure it out. thing is, she had a scholarship. thing is, she partied hard and studied not hard and is subsequently no longer eligible for her scholarship. naturally she's being rewarded with a car.

And when Ma and Pa start to get insecure about the fact that their middle child is now attending (God forbid.)....community college!....guess who'll be the one they'll tear down to build themselves up?

Understand that when I'm a parent, I may do the same exact things that my parents do. I may have that "ah-ha" moment of understanding and inner peace where unrelenting empathy will settle in and EVERYTHING that my parents have EVER done will suddenly make sense. Again, that's entirely hypothetical. Right now I'm 22...I'm the entitled, selfish first-born; and the whole thing seems pretty effed up. Couldn't pick me up on the side of the highway when my car broke down but, please, reward her failures.

Housing market - anyone?