Shine Some Light

The daytime hours are waning. The sunlight doesn't quite reach the sales floor. Sound proof, bullet proof, high-security cubicle walls - how do the lovely ladies of Cubicle Land maintain their glow?

HookerJones, The Butler and C-dawg have invested in spray tanning.

You get to wear these neat hair net things, as HookerJones demonstrates for us. Just be careful not to let it cover only half of your forehead because then you'll look like you were only partially submerged in the bronzer (and then you'll have a straight line across your forehead. not that I know from experience or anything.)


There's also the option to apply self-tanner. But in the name of Christmas Cheer, I've resorted to wrapping myself in holiday lights to absorb some extra color.

Friend and trainer, J-Fizzle from WTF, has been known to bask in the rays of the fabled Christmas Vacation house. "BITCH why you think I'm so bronze now?"

After putting in some overtime at The Office last night, I decided to take a cruise around town - I had to see this thing for my own eyes.

It does exist.

And it could power a small city.

I don't know who should press charges...the residents next door, the residents across the street, or the residents sharing the back yard. It doesn't have the "two-hundred fifty strands of lights, one thousand bulbs per strand, for a grand total of two-hundred fifty thousand tiny twinkle lights" Chevy Chase 'look' to it. No. There are angels. Strands of multi colored bulbs mixed with strands of white. Nothing says class quite like 8 flashing reindeer and Three Wise Men circling your house, as if to lead one blinding coup d'etat.

Gotta admire their spunk if not their electric bill.

Thank goodness my cube buddy has nothing but three sheets of paper tacked to the stunning grey walls of his cube. Between my mini Christmas tree, advent calendar, and strand of lights, he'd probably be happier next to the Christmas Vacation house.